Free Frenula

Everything went fine with the surgery. Turns out that Eamon's upper lip frenulum (the labial frenulum, also called the labial frenum) was also tied down. This can also cause speech problems and delays, as well as really significant orthodontic issues down the road. If you're really interested in frenula releases (and why wouldn't you be?) and you don't have issues with looking at mouths, you can learn a lot by visiting this website.

Here's some fun pics to document the surgery:


Eamon on the way to surgery, completely baffled as to why his mommy was so gosh darn mean and wouldn't give him any breakfast. Or water. What was up with that? Only Lion really understands his pain.



Eamon, the young Jedi, awaits surgery in possibly the most fabulous playroom ever.




I see London, I see France...

Eamon recovering from surgery by cuddling Bert and watching Sesame Street.

Eamon assuring us that really, he'll be fine.

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And that concludes this portion of the blog.

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Now for the public service announcement for all those people contemplating having babies in the future. This PSA is not for the prudish, as it involves breastfeeding and words like "nip*le," so if that weirds you out, just go back, look at the pics one more time, and X out like nothing ever happened.

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Here's the thing everyone kept saying when I started asking about Eamon's frenulum: "Did you have any problems breastfeeding?" And I would answer "yes," and then all the doctors said, "Why didn't you say something?"

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And I took a deep breath and restrained myself.

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Because folks, I DID say something. I told the lacation consultants and nurses and probably even the custodians at the hospital that something was wrong, the baby couldn't latch, it wasn't working right, and everyone told me there, there, we'd get it, and it would all be fine. Well, Eamon and I tried and tried (and cried and cried) and eventually, we sort of got it. He latched, though only in one particular position.

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But it hurt. It always hurt.

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And when I mentioned it to doctors or lactation consultants, I got told that well, it was supposed to hurt. Try some nipple cream.

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So, okay, I tried the nipple cream. It still hurt, and Eamon had a lot of trouble with acid reflux, and it got to the point where neither of us particularly enjoyed the entire experience...so we went to bottles. I say that easily enough now, but at the time, it felt like a huge, massive failure. I pumped for awhile, but breastfeeding was over at about 6 weeks.

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I read the literature on tight frenula now, and I realize: yeah, that was the problem. Pretty much the entire problem. Everything fits. Eamon couldn't latch right, so he was compensating by tightening his jaw. This made him tired, so he kept stopping feeding in the middle to rest his poor jaw--which is why breastfeeding took forever. Because his latch wasn't right, he would gulp down too much air, and that gave him the acid reflux. When we went to bottles, latching was so much easier, and everything was more or less fixed.

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At the time, I didn't get it. He was my first baby, so I had no idea what breastfeeding was supposed to feel like. I just kept thinking that I was being a wimp and needed to toughen up. I was also terribly sleep-deprived, so I just wasn't coherant enough to put together the his tight frenulum with the breastfeeding. And moreover, I desperately wanted everything to just be okay, so I didn't push Eamon's regular pediatrician, who just keep telling us to wait and see.

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So, okay, there's some guilt about the breastfeeding. I don't care whether there should or shouldn't be--whether anyone thinks it's my fault or not--because I still feel like Eamon and I missed something pretty special no matter how much I logically tell myself that I did the best I could at the time.

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Which I think, maybe, accounts for my pushing the pediatrician this time for the surgery. Like, I had gone with the "wait and see" approach once, and while Eamon didn't actually suffer, this all could have been fixed awhile ago. Newborns recover so much more quickly from frenula releases than toddlers because the frenulum itself hasn't thickened yet. It's a 5 minute procedure and the kid can breastfeed immediately afterwards. There's no general anesthesia, and no stitches.

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I screwed up. I did the best I could, but it was a mistake not to push for the surgery right then and there.

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So when it became apparent that Eamon was having trouble talking...I couldn't do it again. We already missed out on breastfeeding because I wanted so much to just believe that everything was okay. I couldn't wait and see. It was time to finally make the right decision for my baby.

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The public service announcement is this: Ladies (and gentlemen), if breastfeeding hurts, and your doctor tells you to just use nipple cream, try it for 2 days. If it still hurts, then go back. Find a lactation consultant, and tell them. Tell them nipple cream doesn't cut it. Tell anyone and everything until someone finally does something about it.

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And if someone says your child has a tight frenulum, for heaven's sake, just get the thing snipped then. Bully your doctor if you have to, bully your insurance company. Because even though Eamon is okay and recovering, this surgery was still a lot more traumatic than it needed to be (though not nearly as traumatic as it would have been if we'd waited any longer).

I love you, kiddo. Sorry your mouth hurts.